An Open Letter to the Salty Badger

Dear Salts,

I welcome you to the All My Friends family of marine freaks and talking cuts of meat. My first order of duty is to bestow you with the Malcolm Douglas Award for inspired writing by Hairy Sea Beasts*. This award means you can now walk into the Golden Gate Hotel and receive a 20% discount on shellfish(except on Sundays and public holidays) and half-price salt-reduced haircuts at Festers Fine Fur Co.

Let me be the first to congratulate you, and warn you. Somewhere deep in this blog is a collection of creatures that mean us harm. They keyed a cryptic message into the side of my salty Monaro the other day when i was out drinking with T-Bones. Maybe you can help us decipher what it means...

'Favour finds the troubled soul. Hell to pay for all your gold.'

If you need me, I'll be drinking in the park with T-Bones trying to pick up fatty fatty backpackers.

Chomp Chomp.